Assistant Editor</b> ’Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house<br>
Not a creature was stirring, not even mouse.<br>
There were no stockings hung by the chimney at all<br>
Because, like the rest of Christmas, they had been recalled.<br>
It was not the plot of the Grinch that stole the holiday cheer<br>
But of media hype and government bungling that filled consumers with fear.</p><p>

No lights, no tinsel, no holiday treats,<br>
No gifts, no fire, no carols in the street<br>
All that made the yuletide gay<br>
Had by government decree been taken away.</p><p>

The Christmas goose had never arrived,<br>
It has been euthanized for fear of AI.<br>
Aunt Martha collapsed in a fit of hysteria<br>
When her potato salad was found to have listeria.</p><p>

The roast beef dinner and pumpkin pie<br>
Were found to have traces of H571 E.coli.<br>
Piece by piece Christmas dinner was taken away<br>
By investigators from the FDA.</p><p>

Santa used Fed Ex to get his gifts on their way<br>
Because the Department of Homeland Security had impounded his sleigh.<br>
Veterinary help old Rudolph did need<br>
Because of plastic contamination in his feed.</p><p>

Once described as a jolly old elf,<br>
Santa was not under fire for just being himself.<br>
From his black leather boots to the fur on his cap,<br>
PETA was telling him he is not where it is at.</p><p>

The lung association was also spreading media hype<br>
To get old St Nick to lose the pipe. <br>
Sweets and treats are a holiday staple,<br>
But they were banned from the holiday table.</p><p>

The food police saw to that<br>
By banning the things that make us fat.<br>
From eggnog to cookies to sugar plums and pies,<br>
They were all wisked away in the blink of an eye.</p><p>

The only thing left may seem incredible,<br>
It was fruitcake (they said it was not edible).<br>
The giggles and smiles of girls and boys<br>
Were absent due to a shortage of toys.</p><p>

Toys from China were found to be tainted<br>
With lead in the paint with which they had been painted.<br>
Parents were mad, children were sad,<br>
And toy makers felt like they had been had. </p><p>

Despite the winter chill of December,<br>
A roaring fire will have to be only remembered.<br>
No firewood could be brought to the cabin door<br>
Because of the threat of the emerald ash borer.</p><p>

Even when local wood cold be gained,<br>
Permission to burn from the EPA could not be obtained. <br>
Even with the recalls of this passing year,<br>
True hearts can still be filled with Christmas cheer.</p><p>

It is not the food and the fun that is important to see,<br>
But what’s in our hearts – what we believe.<br>
If faith, hope, and love are what we hold dear,<br>
Then we have all we need for Christmas cheer.<br>
While the trappings of Christmas can be taken away,<br>
The true sprit of the season is here to stay. </p><p>

The views and opinions expressed in this column are those of the author and not necessarily those of Farm World. Readers with questions or comments for Gary Truitt may write to him in care of this  publication.